Bigglezworth
February 19th, 2014, 03:36
I posted this on another car forum I frequent and thought it might get a couple of chuckles on this. I have sat next to the senior partner in my company for a number of years and frequently hear him talking with others around the office. He always comes up with so many funny sayings that I started to write them down a while back. Here's a list of a few of the more funny quotes. I know they aren't all original to him, but they are still funny. What have you heard your colleagues or friends quote that makes you chuckle?
- What is it the client REALLY wants to pay for?
- Not everything worth doing is worth doing well.
- Redefining the problem is a perfectly legitimate way to solve the problem
- I’m not as green as I look grassy
- Cynicism in the pursuit of truth is not cynicism
- Having lost site of their objectives, they doubled their efforts.
- . . . speak with great authority about things you know little about
- Client ((kl nt) v. “Someone whose expectations don’t meet his or her resources”
- When it comes to the decision of whether to be late, or issue poor drawings, be late.
- The best defence against slander is the facts
- The issue of people wanting to take responsibility to solve the problem, causes the problem
- Just because they’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re out to get ya.
- We are at the point where you have to do what I tell you.
- You gotta jump in with both feet. Because if you walk in slowly you’re gonna run out as soon as your balls touch the water.
- If the difference doesn’t make a difference there is no difference
- Architecture: A loosely constructed ship on a slow moving island.
- There really is a VERY easy solution!
- It’s hard to hear you over the sucking sound.
- Politicians can make promises, but don’t promise the Politician
- Add a set of drapes and the contractor will try to sell you the window again!
- That's like debating evolution in a small Texas town. The facts will be on your side, but you still won't win.
- What is it the client REALLY wants to pay for?
- Not everything worth doing is worth doing well.
- Redefining the problem is a perfectly legitimate way to solve the problem
- I’m not as green as I look grassy
- Cynicism in the pursuit of truth is not cynicism
- Having lost site of their objectives, they doubled their efforts.
- . . . speak with great authority about things you know little about
- Client ((kl nt) v. “Someone whose expectations don’t meet his or her resources”
- When it comes to the decision of whether to be late, or issue poor drawings, be late.
- The best defence against slander is the facts
- The issue of people wanting to take responsibility to solve the problem, causes the problem
- Just because they’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re out to get ya.
- We are at the point where you have to do what I tell you.
- You gotta jump in with both feet. Because if you walk in slowly you’re gonna run out as soon as your balls touch the water.
- If the difference doesn’t make a difference there is no difference
- Architecture: A loosely constructed ship on a slow moving island.
- There really is a VERY easy solution!
- It’s hard to hear you over the sucking sound.
- Politicians can make promises, but don’t promise the Politician
- Add a set of drapes and the contractor will try to sell you the window again!
- That's like debating evolution in a small Texas town. The facts will be on your side, but you still won't win.